Turns out recovery from sick is a bit harder with two littles, at least for me. With only Sevi it was so easy. Lots of snuggles and quiet time together. Keeping track of the domestic stuff between naps. But with an extra person, an infant, it’s like you get sick in waves. So it feels like forever until the whole house is well. In the meantime the laundry, dishes and housework pile up. And I’m not a neat freak or anything, but I like things to be tidy so this is challenging for me. I need to spend a few days recovering and getting things back in order.
But an amazing thing happened. I really really enjoyed the break from the internets. I took time from FB as well, which seems to be a major life sucker for me. As if it were divine guidance, I stumbled upon the concept of Slow Blogging while I was going down a blog wormhole one evening. You can read the manifesto here, but it’s basically someone’s call to bring back purpose in blog writing. In telling your story with meaning and intention. That not everything has to be documented. “It is a willingness to let current events pass without comment.” Oh, this is hard for me. I want to write it all down, take pictures, read your stories, and give you comment love. I don’t want to miss out on anything.
I’ve been having this conversation with myself for some time now, but this put it into perspective for me. Just because I didn’t blog about it, doesn’t mean it didn’t happen to me. And just because I didn’t take a picture, doesn’t mean the event wasn’t memorable. And really, I should call you and say hello or meet with you and grab your hand, and say Thank You, in person instead of just read your blog. This paragraph from the manifesto sums it up for me:
“Slow Blogging is a willingness to remain silent amid the daily outrages and ecstasies that fill nothing more than single moments in time, switching between banality, crushing heartbreak and end-of-the-world psychotic glee in the mere space between headlines. The thing you wished you said in the moment last week can be said next month, or next year, and you’ll only look all the smarter.”
Most importantly, this makes me think of my children. I have small, very small, children and they need me more than they probably will ever again in their lives. At least in such a present and physical way. In my quest to capture every moment of every thing in our lives, I’m missing the parts just before they bloom. I get the first words, the first step, our finished teas and tinctures. But I miss the stumbles before the steps, the spilled herbs on the floor while learning to scoop and pour, those delicate petals of learning curled and awkward, moments before they pop out into a flower. The anticipation, the failures, the journey they represent, lasting much longer than the life of the flower itself. I love this blog and had high hopes for it, but I have to slow down. I’ve listened to John Mayer for years but I don’t always pay attention to the words. As long as the music is fun, I listen. But Drew asked me to sit down and listen, with intention to his song ’3×5′ the other day and it brought me to the floor. You can read the lyrics here. So, I’m taking the advice of John Mayer:
Didn’t have a camera by my side this time
Hoping I would see the world with both my eyes
Hoping I would see the world with both my eyes
…
Today I finally overcame
Tryin’ to fit the world inside a picture frame
Tryin’ to fit the world inside a picture frame
I’m going to take some time to slow down and pay attention to my life a little bit before it passes me by and hopefully You’ll be with me next time I go outside.
I apologize in advance for this lengthy comment. I cannot tell you how much I love this post. Since I started my blog about six months ago, I have never been on the Internet this much before, even while I had a fast-paced corporate job…I'm a stay-at-home-mom now. I wrote a somewhat similar post (http://bambinosteps.com/2010/07/finding-balance/) a couple months back and took a short break from it all. Now back "in" again, I already feel like I've spiraled back into too much Blogland. I thoroughly enjoy your blog, and one thing I appreciate about it, is that you don't post 10 times a day. It's so difficult to keep up with those that do. Enjoy each and every moment – you've inspired me to take a step back as well.
I love that John Mayer also has a song called "The Great Indoors", for the days when you are feeling the complete opposite.
Herb mother, I have been following your posts for awhile now and enjoy them very much but believe me I totally understand your wanting to slow down. Even though my blogs rarely are my own words I had to slow down also just got to crazy , Looking and searching the net for good articles to add to my Blogs. Have a great time with your Family and drop by your blog from time to time.
Debbie
Smart mama. That transition from 1 to 2 kids was very difficult for me and I found I needed to direct most of my energy into figuring it out and enjoying those moments with my sweet babies. It gets easier as they get older to enjoy a balance of the things you love as well.
Keep listening to that inner wisdom. Always enjoy your posts!
Hello Herb Mother! LOVE this post! Love SLOW everything, especially food
You are a smart cookie! I did my herbal training at RavenCroft Gardens. Try googling it. Happy to know you and others are out there keepin it real. My good friends have a website: Learning Herbs. Just thinking you might find these interesting. Come visit Washington!!
@kimberly, long comments are great. its like conversing. type away mama. balance is the hardest part, but we've gotta keep in touch too.
@debbie, thanks for the kindness.
@OM, glad to know i am not alone. sisterhood is nice. one of the best things about blogging i think.
@jennette, you know the gallaghers??? john graciously added my blog to their blog roll. it made my whole month. i absolutely LOVE them. i have all of their free stuff printed in a binder, took one ecourse and hope to join their website next year when ill have a bit more time.
Hey Herb Mother! I found you through BYW.
this really was a fantastic post, and just what I needed this morning. Hope you're completely cold free now.
thanks PC! glad to meet you. we are well, but now im so overwhelmed with all the work and info from BYW I haven't time for my blog!
What a beautiful post! Stillness is so important to me. I do try to unplug from the computer once a week but it doesn't always seem enough. I like the idea of applying stillness and space to blogging. I'll be taking a break as I invite a new life into the world, so this is perfect timing to practice this. Thank you!